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tishta.rediffiland.com/
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I do...... or I dont !?!
Like any other Indian Family when I turned 24 my parents started to look for a suitable groom, because ofcourse falling in love and marrying a guy of your choice is sinful (21st century is yet to make an impact in Bihar or the 20th or the 19th for that matter.............One day we shall have electricity Grandma... dont bury the blender just yet) But with us Biharis things are a little extreme.. for eg...... you are either an IAS / IPS / IITian or a criminal.If you are not a succesful engineer with a 6 figure salary, then its very likely that you are a rickshaw driver/ vegetable vendor/milk man....etc You get the drift right...... So we go overboard, but after 2 solid years of groom hunting and still no luck you blow the whistle and the relatives join in the search (Like a police party). Phone rings and dad wants to "take it in the other room because its an adult thing" (As if I am 3.. hah.. you wish ) Relatives want to know why !? Their suggestion ....... "You being the Father of the Bride to be, need to overlook some shortcomings because nobody is perfect" .........except their son in law..... I mean define shortcomings .... A missing leg..... A missing character....what !?!? So anyways, thus started the process of meeting boys and in one case boys brother I still remember my very first experience of meet the boy / boys brother... It was my birthday and I had to meet the brother of one such prospective groom. We decided the place and I waited for him with two of my other friends. We looked and looked hard at every guy who was wearing black(he said he was wearing a black T)..... and hoped that any goodlooking guy in black who passed by would be the one... but I was completly disappointed when he finally appeard.... I mean how could they do this to me on my birthday... so anyways we headed for the coffee place... Turns out he looked even more ugly under yellow light.... That was the end of that. Prospect No.2 met him in a crowded mall with family... It was going well... Till he rudely interupted his Mother who was having a conversation over the phone, for disregarding the fact that she was sitting in the company of others.... Till date I cant decided what is more rude..... mother on the phone or son screaming at her. Preospect no3. He was 5 feet 4 inches... enough said!!! Prospect no 4: A very good looking Bihari (its a dying breed) with an accent fresh from the fields of Bihar...ummmmmmm.. ok some others in between better not mentioned......................... and to make it worst my friends had to get married....ughhh .... and they call themselves my friends............. So you see if you are a 27 year old single Bihari girl, living with her parents every one wants to know whats wrong!? I wonder what it feels like not to be that girl............................
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Unbreakable
Walking down the road in Colaba I experienced the unthinkable This guy appeared from no where and grabbed me... without a moments hesitation i ran after him and jabbed a punch on the back of his neck.... he flung his hand which landed on my ear and before I could recover from the shock he ran away. I clenched my fist, gritted my teeth and with tears in my eyes, walked in the other direction feeling completely helpless. It took me 2 days to recover I was told that I was very brave to have done what I did and then there were others who thought that it could have turned ugly.... but I guess in that fraction of a second when i decided to fight the guy all I could see was him....... walking away........ like nothing had happened .......and i could not let that happen. I guess no amount of punishment is enough for ppl like him, except maybe to throw them infront of a speeding train or better yet, let a wild animal snack on them..... And like any other tragedy there were bystanders, who watched!! PS: Dont jus be a bystander and watch
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The Final Awakening
16th September 1982 - 22nd February 2008 Birth..... Life.... Happiness.... Suffering.... Pain.... Sorrow..... Joy.... and the inevitable DEATH Its a cycle.. for some the cycle is completed in a shorter duration Once upon a time there was an innocent boy, who loved and respected his parents, cared for his younger brother selflessly and wanted to give him all the happiness in the world, spread joy in the lives of every one around him............. always wanting to help.......... what a "gem" His simplicity was misunderstood. His extraordinary kindness made every one around him feel ordinary. He was not meant for this world they say... This selfish world He has completed his journey within 24 years..........and it is the next level for him now.... like Tetris... The next level!! He fell sick and never recovered...........His condition deteriorated every day and we watched him die slowly ....... The infection spread to evey part of his body but still we hoped and prayed for a miracle......... This tragic end was inconcievable......... But after struggling for his life in the ICU of a famous hospital he vaccated Bed No. 8457 leaving behind his grieving parents, a brother who does not realise what he has lost and relatives who stood by his side in those last days. A day does not pass when you are not remembered. His face flashes infront of our eyes........... the innocence.......... the smile........ he stares at us from the innumerable family photos and videos celebrating birthdays, rakhi, holi, diwali.......... there will be no more.. Here is to you baby, whereever you are.... you shall be missed This is not the end but the final awakening................ Until we meet again!!
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Dilli
Delhi......... Went to Delhi for the weekend... Visiting cousins..... getting away from the routine....... Freezing weather!!! The temperature went as low as 6 degrees.... brrrr........ within a few seconds of landing I knew i was up for some serious chilling or should I say freezing........... Carried every piece of warm clothing I owned.... and thats a total of 3. A denim Jacket a sweater and a sweat shirt............ and with that I was ready to brave the Delhi winters... or so I thought............ Delhi was gearing up for the republic Day Parade.... Wanted to see the parade, but dropped the idea... the thought of getting up at 4 in the morning and standing in a queue to watch the parade had something to do with it....... :) Met my favourite cousin sis and her husband(my own personal geanie for the next two days) and had a great time. Let myself be pampered being the youngest cousin en all........ Travelled on the metro.... They have managed to maintain a fair degree of cleanliness and I did not have to elbow anyone to get in.. The stations have signs all over saying chewing of beetle leaves and gum is not allowed .... I guess the"DONT SPIT" signs dont work anymore... he he he Saw the Qutub Minar... went to Delhi Haat... sorry I mean Dilli haat......... I think its just great... anybody visiting Delhi must visit Dilli Haat.... Some really cool stuff to pick and choose from........ Saw a 4D movie at Spice mall Bought this really chic robe/ jacket for mum () and a cool looking kurta for dad............. Gifted di a coffee set. It was an "artdinox" . Jiju said it is an expensive lifestyle brand. She said she liked it..... I like buying gifts.............. I dont buy gifts too often or for too many people........... but when i do, i would like it to be the best............. What I most love about gifting is to see the ex-pressions on the faces of people who are receiving those gifts......the twinkle in their eyes the genuine happiness...... Its priceless........ Genuine being the key word :).............. Dos and donts of gifting Dos 1) Buy gifts (Only then will you get gifts :)!!! 2) Buy meaningful gifts(Remember what goes around comes around) 3) Do not set a budget........ you are limiting your options 4) Give it personally.... its only then that you can see joy on the face of the person who receives the gift(unless they dont like it and thats when it backfires) Dont 1) Dont not buy gifts make a plan and take a random trip.......... and you relise how much fun it can be.... even if it is family :)
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And then there is love..... or is it !?!
Is there a thing called "LOVE"... or is it something that happens only to a Shahrukh or an Amir in Kuch Kuch hota hai and the likes.... Like I said, everyone has a blog on Love!! Its time I wrote one too…. Just so that I don’t feel left out J We all have our theory on love I have two. Theory number one (No its not a new Govinda flick!!) Love is like fashion every one wants it but no one can understand it. Theory number two And this one is more profound. I strongly believe that if you have been with A special someone for a period of 2 years and by that I mean truly in love with and deeply committed (and not having had the urge to suffocate him / her in their sleep) then you are meant to be with that person for the rest of your life. I sincerely feel that love is only secondary, what is more important is compatibility, understanding and mutual respect. Its not a formula, neither is it a recipe for a successful relationship. But with my limited experience I can tell you that love is not alllll…………. Coming from a family with a mindset that boys are evil, there were limited interactions with the opposite sex. But once I became the master of my own will, although a little late in life I realized how important it was to have gone through the butterfly in the stomach, starry eyed, he loves me he loves me not, Drawing hearts, etching names on any empty space and late night talks that went on til 4 in the morning about absolutely nothing, but also everything Phase. These experiences are an important part of life. They tell you what to expect or should I say what not to expect. Well I have never really believed in love. Fairies - Yes Miracles - Yes Patriotic Politicians - Ok lets not push it Love - Hell no Love is over hyped. (But then again in todays day and age who is looking for love, physical gratification is it !?! ) If you ask me there is no such thing as love, Infatution ... I understand!.... crushes(temporary obsession with a person of opposite sex or same sex depending upon ones sexual orientation) .... Possible! Compatability ..... absolutely !! But Love is something I do not understand.............
I believe that a relationship can work only if two people are friends first. And that to me is how close one can get to love... And if this blog was to be renamed ever, it would read " and then I wonder why I am single "... he he he
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Sunday!! the day that was........ Absolutely random
Just another sunday... reflecting and thinking about the day the week the year that was........ I believe in horoscopes and predictions..... The year of 2007 they said I would do something unexpected .... I guess that turned out to be true...... There is this lingering feeling of discontentment and unhappiness.... Feeling of not wanting to let go but knowing that whats not yours has to be given up sometime or the other And missing some friends may have had something to do with it..... Got my eyebrows and upper lip done 1556th time but it still hurts...... and i feel like a lesser man too.... thats all the pain that I can take today... I know the lyrics to Khoya khoya Chand title track.... Its absolutely beautiful " Kyuon khoye khoye chand ki firaak mein talaash mein udaas hai dil.... Kyon apne aap se khafa khafa zara zara sa naraaz hai dil...Yeh manzilen bhi khud hi taye karen yeh faslein bhi khud hi taye kare.... kyun to rastoon pe saham saham sambhal sambhal ke chalta hai dil.... Zindgi sawaloon ke jawaab dhondnein chali...... jawaab nein sawaloon ki ek lambi si ladi milli ....sawaal hein sawaal hain soojhti nahin gali......... ke aaj haath tham lo ek haath ki kamin khali Dil ko samjhana kehdo kya aasan hai... dil to fitrat se sunlo na beiman hai... ye khush nahin hai jo mila... bas magta hi hai chala... janta hai har lagi ka dard hi hai ebas ek sila " Read a lil bit of Games ppl play..... It said that lack of physical contact can be compared to lack of food (starvation) and both of these can have a fatal impact.... Hmmm..... interesting!! and on some level i believe it.... Oh lord I have another level............... ........................the term "blog" is not my phone dictionary......................... Going for an icecream with an old friend.... quite looking forward to it... and I dont jus mean the icecream...... Little pleasures of life... Will listen to khoya khoya chand one last time today and then will call it a day......
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t..
In life you meet some people and you dont want them to ever go away... sensitivity and charm oozing from them, well mannered and courteous, killer looks and a million dollar smile..... And then their are others like T.... (ha ha ha..... ) And thus the story begins of T and Me.... Met him in the back office of TWE. Tall guy, spoke well, cracked some decent jokes, obverall made a good first impression (scared of me!?!... ya right). I was in a new city eager to settle in, still not willing to com promise, he was my first friend in Bangalore. It was a pleasant conversation. Nice. Thereon pleasantries were exchanged whenever we bumped into each other in the hotel. He kept me company at lunch occasionally. We went for breakfast and he criticised my shoes (too white.. lol). And then he quit! Almost a year had passed when we got in touch again. He was going through a break up... never could tell... Strong... maybe too strong I thought... or jus like any other guy maybe.... He saw me through some difficult times. It was nice to have someone to talk too without being judged... thanks
He can be very pushy... sometimes crosses the line to the extent of being insensitive and leaves me flustered......... you will not hear the end of that :)
I jus remembered our conversation from the other day....... What I really like about you is that you are a very approachable guy, Smart and confident, there is nothing that you cannot do jus like Superman except that you wear your underwear inside, I think!...well its definitely not on the outside.....................:) I can talk to you about anything and nothing ....... And you have some valuable advice to give, right after you have recovered from the laughter attack from ridiculing me for my ignorance You have this young achiever apeal about you.... But what is adoreble is that you dont let it get to your head.... We all have this void that we try to fill, either with people or with things….. You have done that for me and I truly value our friendship :)
Some time in life i met T.... Not the most sensitive (he says deal with it or beat it) Charming only when he wants to be... have got a glimpse of it. Well mannered and courteous (most of the times) Cute looking :) with a laughter straight from the heart which may lead you to believe that he is an innocent little boy.... Do not be fooled ;) And you wish to be friends forever.................. The Begining..............
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.......
...... Sometimes the enormity of a loss numbs your senses.... and then one day, not until you cross path with a past left far behind, do you realise what you have lost....And then you know that the sadness and the tears were long overdue.
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Mumbai-Bangalore-Mumbai
Had a great weekend in Bangalore... among old friends and familiarity..... Nostalgia set in as i landed at the Blore Airport... I had made Bangalore-Mumbai-Bangalore trip countless number of times in the last two years. But this time it was different. My itnerary read Mumbai-Bangalore-Mumbai. I had bid my farewell to the city six months back, never to return. But I guess I just couldnt stay away :) Some old friends, some confused relationships.... new friend, Regrets, lost times, memories, Mango outlet at Garuda mall, Infiniti, Casa Picollo, Angadi. Staff pathway and the long conversations. the executive offices above the lobby.Office GOSSIP;)................. and so much more. Stayed in my old house... But it did not seem familiar anymore... the warmth that I once felt on entering the house was no longer there.. Met old friends and shared long conversations about life and its ways...... Weekend is over.Now I am back to Mumbai. Back to the long commute Back to the uniform. Back to work.
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The End......
It has taken me this long to write about a special person in my life and to admit that he has meant a lot to me. In a city which was otherwise a stranger to me, he was my friend. He stood by my side like a faithful and showed me love. Every street that we roamed, every restaurant that we frequented... I couldnt go back to those places with him not by my side. He treated me like a princess. He is innocent like a child, stubborn as a mule. I could trust him with my life.Great sense of humour. Always wanting to do more. It was my decision to call it off.
There was a lot more that was left desired out of this relationship. I would have been miserable. We would have been miserable. On my visit this time we hardly met. He seemed so calm and collected and matured. He seemed like he had finally moved on. It has been over six months. He said i meant a lot to him. I always would. I dint know what to say... I dont know what I am feeling but these tears wont stop.. That must mean something. I wish him all the happiness in life.
Once again I will look the other way when he yearns for my attention. I am told it will be good for him. Hope so! I miss you! I miss your friendship........ Hope one day we can look back at it all and smile.....
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